Humour Noir

[Patricia]

[Invité]

Le 30/03/2022 à 23:08, Patricia a dit :

Ça me rappelle cette fantastique campagne suisse :

 

 

[Invité]

Très joli move

[Patricia]

Il y a 7 heures, Frédéric HÔ a dit :

Ça me rappelle cette fantastique campagne suisse :

https://youtu.be/RL4TGGURZbQ

J'adore cette campagne belge également : 

 

[Invité]

Quelle est la couleur de la voiture de Travolta ?

- Elle est Grease.

J'ai tout donné là.

Edit : le drame est que cette blague de très bon goût existe déjà :

Modifié 1 avril 2022 par Frédéric HÔ

[Invité]

Il a vraiment pas de bol ce mec..

[SébastienO]

Du coté magique, on est pas en reste non plus, en ce 1er Avril.

Lorsqu'on regarde du côté des nouveaux produits de chez Vanishing, on trouve ceci:

The Ultimate Thumb Tip Kit, pour la modique somme de £401 (le chiffre n'est pas innocent ).

 

Et c'est quand on regarde la description qu'on se rend compte qu'il y a certains trucs louches.

 

Citation

After years of planning and preparation, we’re excited to announce the launch of our latest product, “The Ultimate Thumb Tip Kit™ ”. After extensive research and development, working with the finest artists and manufacturers in the world, we’ve solved one of magic’s biggest problems.

For years, thumb tips have been just cheap bits of plastic. Today, that all changes.

 

The Ultimate Thumb Tip™

Thumb tips have either been too hard or too soft. And they are made out of plastic. Something that we are trying to minimize our use of globally—and personally.

After extensive prototyping, experimenting with a huge amount of different material, we’ve developed a thumb tip that has exactly the right amount of give, whilst still being robust enough for all modern thumb tip moves.

We’ve found the ultimate solution is to use actual human skin. This vegan material is biodegradable, organic and wholly sustainable. It removes any plastic reflections traditional tips can suffer from completely.

The other issue is with sizing. We’ve solved this with a custom offering. We send you some VI Clay™ into which you insert your thumb. Send it back to us (postage paid) and we’ll mold a thumb tip that is exactly right for YOUR THUMB.

But, that’s not all… We promised the ultimate kit. So, here’s what else you get.

 

The Ultimate Amount Of Salt™

Imagine being able to vanish the right amount of salt, every time. And then, when you want, be able to produce the right amount of salt, down to the very last grain. Using innovative, blockchain crypto AI machine learning, the bag of salt you receive contains exactly the right amount to be able to be concealed in your “Ultimate Thumb Tip™”. It’s automatically adjusted to your thumb, ensuring the perfect pour every time!

 

The Ultimate Small Pocket Square™

How about taking a small pocket square, and causing it to dematerialize right in front of your spectators’ eyes?! Imagine their shock and surprise when you cause it to appear again. This is TOTALLY under your control AT ALL TIMES. This silk is hand-sewn by Italian artisans we sourced locally in Turin.

Available in a wide range of dapper VI colors, and constructed with Ultimate Compression™ technology, these silks will compress smaller than any other silk on the market. And thanks to proprietary hard-wearing technology, these babies will last you a lifetime. Get the whole range and you’ll never have to worry about matching with your VI apparel ever again.

 

BONUS: The Ultimate Pre-folded Bill™

We get you. We’re magicians too. Who has time to fold a bill for a bill switch. Not us. That’s why we’ve included a range of bills, all pre-folded to suit every performance situation.

Morning gig in New York? Just grab your Ultimate Pre-folded Dollar Bill™, Ultimate Small Pocket Square™ and make Madison Ave. your magical playground. Being flown out to Paris this weekend for a corporate to-do? Don’t forget to pack your Ultimate Prefolded Euro™. You’ll be the greatest thing to hit France since the invention of the baguette.

Whatever, and wherever you perform, there’s an Ultimate Prefolded Bill™ for you.

Note: You will receive One (1) Ultimate Prefolded Bill™ in your choice of currency. Additional bills are available:

Pre-folded $100 bill - $110

Pre-folded €100 Euro bill - €110

 

Deluxe Edition

For that special magic touch, we are making just two Deluxe Collector’s editions available. One crafted from the very skin Mr. Andi Gladwin covers his body with, and the other—you guessed it—gently prised from the area surrounding Joshua Jay’s organs. Yes, there is only one each of these available and they are $25,000 each. They are very worthy of consideration for your magic collection. Please contact us if you are interested in this. Affordable installment plans are available.

 

[Invité]

De quoi commencer le weekend sur les chapeaux de roue:

[Invité]

Ça ne serait jamais arrivé avec un brossage des dents assidu..

[Olivier SSK (If....)]

Le 01/04/2022 à 09:12, Frédéric HÔ a dit :

Quelle est la couleur de la voiture de Travolta ?

- Elle est Grease.

J'ai tout donné là.

Edit : le drame est que cette blague de très bon goût existe déjà :

J'en avais une version avec laquelle je me suis mangé un nombre incroyable de bide, mais je viens peut-être de comprendre pourquoi :

De quelle couleur est la voiture de John Travolta ?

Elle est la fièvre du samedi soir !